Friday, March 31, 2006

If he said it, then he is truthful...

Heres the khutbah I delivered on campus today. I was a little disappointed because my khateebs bailed out on me and I was stuck to write the khutbah friday morning before salaah because i had an exam thursday and then work in the evening. Khayr, i think it was alright, other than the fact that I didnt get a chance to make the khutbah into an outline so i took it in the form below, and brought a pen to mark what I had already said. Twas not a good idea as I began playing with the pen as I spoke annoying those were listening im sure.


- One year before the Hijrah, which is relatively early in the da’wah of the Prophet PBUH, there was an event that took place. The event was something that if you were to hear of it today, unless you have iman you might think it is some type of made up story, let alone those who heard it back in the time of the Prophet.

- This event was al Israa’ wal Me’raaj, the night journey of the Prophet PBUH to Jerusalem and then his subsequent ascension into the heavens to meet Allah swt and then back. The day after the event took place, the Prophet PBUH spoke of the event that had taken place, and for many Muslims this was a test because they were new in Islam and to hear of something so miraculous was almost too strange to be reality for them. Yet other companions showed the strength of their faith that day, namely Abu Bakr ra.

- The Quraish began to go around mocking what the Prophet PBUH had claimed, going around and asking the Muslims if they believe in such a foolish thing.

- They said to Abu Bakr, "Look at what your companion is saying. He says he went to Jerusalem and came back in one night." The response of Abu Bakr was a profound response, it was a response that insha Allah today’s khutbah will be based on. Abu Bakr told them, "If he said that, then he is truthful.”

- Brothers and Sisters, Allah swt tells us in the Quran

يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُواْ ادْخُلُواْ فِي السِّلْمِ كَآفَّةً وَلاَ تَتَّبِعُواْ خُطُوَاتِ الشَّيْطَانِ إِنَّهُ لَكُمْ عَدُوٌّ مُّبِينٌ

O You who believe! Enter into Islam whole heartedly, and do not follow the footsteps of the evil one; for he is to you and avowed enemy.

- In this verse Allah swt is outlining two very important guidelines for us to follow if we wish to be called those who believe

- Enter into Islam whole heartedly
- To enter into Islam whole heartedly means that as muslims we must accept Allah swt as both our Rabb and our Ilaah.
- To accept Allah swt as only our Rabb would mean that there is no difference between us and others who believe in Allah’s existence, as to accept Allah as our Rabb only means that we accept him as our provider, caretaker and sustainer. To believe this does not necessarily mean that you have accepted Islam as in the Quran, Allah swt tells us what Shaytaan will say on the day of judgement. He will say ‘Innee akaafullaha rabbal Alameen’ “verily I fear Allah, Lord of all that exists”. And then in surah Ya seen a group of disbelievers take it a step further by saying to the people calling them to Islam

قَالُوا مَا أَنتُمْ إِلاَّ بَشَرٌ مِّثْلُنَا وَمَا أَنزَلَ الرَّحْمن مِن شَيْءٍ إِنْ أَنتُمْ إِلاَّ تَكْذِبُونَ

- The (people) said: "Ye are only men like ourselves; and ((Allah)) Most Gracious sends no sort of revelation: ye do nothing but lie

- They even recognize that Allah swt is ar Rahman, yet they negate the fact that Allah swt is ALSO the ilaah of all that exists.

- To accept Allah swt as our Ilaah means that we accept him not only as the one who sustains us and provides for us, but also as our law giver and our establisher of rules on this earth.

- To negate this role of Allah swt is negating the very nature of Islam as it was revealed to all the Prophets who came before.

- The second part of the verse that I recited to you earlier states a warning from Allah swt, and this warning ties directly into the acceptance of Allah as our Law giver. “And do not follow the footsteps of the evil one; for he is to you an avowed enemy”

- Brothers and Sisters: What is it that Iblees did which earned him such a curse from Allah swt? What did he do to become such a being that we are asked before we do almost anything of relevance to seek refuge from him before we begin? He, in the company of the angels who are free from sin, refused a command of Allah swt based upon what his own intellect and desire said to him.

- Imagine the scene: In the presence of Allah swt, rows upon rows of angels there, only those whom Allah swt had permitted to be there were there to witness the unveiling of this creation of Allah: Adam. Allah swt then after bringing his creation forth, told all those who were there to bow to Adam not out of worship of man, but out of respect of this great creation of Allah. Everyone making sajdah, except one being. What defiance! What arrogance to be before the Lord who created you, and to reject HIS honorable commands! Then after refusing this command of Allah so defiantly he explained himself. He said that he was made of fire and Adam of clay, therefore he concluded that he was better than Adam and that he did not need to bow to Adam.

- This response from Shaytaan which earned him eternal damnation from Allah swt, is unfortunately the same logic that many muslims around the world use today when given a command from Allah swt.

- Shaytaan this day showed that he took his intellect, an intellect which was fashioned by Allah swt, as his law giver, rejecting the right of Allah swt to command us as HE wills.

- How can we possibly think that we as human beings, a being which does know anything except that which we are taught, can challenge the authority of Allah swt by not doing as we are commanded to do?

- Allah swt has given us the absolute best way to do everything in our life. Any command that HE has given us is better for us for 2 reasons. 1 because we will be rewarded for obeying Allah in the hearafter, and 2 because this obeying will be the best path to follow for success in this life.

- There are so many examples of how Allah has given us a command, and then scientists through millions of dollars worth of research and years of hard work, come to verify that which Allah has already told us.

- Alcohol for instance, Allah clearly tells us why it is prohibited for us. He tells us in the Quran that there is some good in it, but that the bad outweighs the good therefore we should stay away from it. Scientists recently are researching the benefits of alcohol and they find these obscure benefits for its being drunk just to show that it has good qualities in it, yet Allah already told us it has good qualities, and it is obvious to us how harmful alcohol is to societies, and therefore we stay away from it.

- Of course this religion of Islam is a religion which is complete, and Allah swt has perfected it for us and chosen this path for us. But if any one of us were to try and take on all of the religion at once, it could be potentially hazardous to our faith as was advised to us by the Prophet PBUH.

- But we must be careful of an attitude which is creeping into our ummah, an attitude that is taking people out of Islam daily. This is the attitude of taking some of the religion and rejection part of it out of convenience, and suggesting that some of the religion is outdated and is not necessary to follow anymore.

- We may turn on the news recently and hear discussions on how certain rulings in our Sacred Law show how we are intolerant people and how this Sacred Law needs to be fought against. We as Muslims, if we hear something like this or are asked about certain rulings in our Law must keep 2 important things in mind when we are answering. 1) We must not compromise with this religion in order to please others. We will be held accountable for that which we say, and to take part and leave part of Islam is something which can take you out of Isam. And 2) there may be rulings which you do not understand fully, but the proper steps you must take is that you do not deny the ruling because you don’t understand it, and that you then seek out people who can explain to you the ruling so that you can understand it.

- If there is a ruling upon which all the established madhahib of fiqi have an ijmaa' upon, then scholars say that rejecting such a ruling can constitute kufr. And this is evident in the saying of the Prophet PBUH [paraphrased] that if my entire ummah comes together in agreement on something, then this has to be the truth as my entire ummah will not agree upon that which is incorrect.

- Allah swt is al Adl, the Most Just, and therefore HE swt will not instruct us to do that which is unjust. Therefore our response to a question of this type should be the response that abu Bakr ra gave to the Quraish that 'if he said it, then he is truthful'

- Intermission

- Salawaat

- Brothers and sisters, for the past month almost, many of the khateebs who have come to give the khutbah have been giving almost the identical khutbah, and this is partly my fault.

- The most seemingly relevant issue that the Muslims are dealing with is the Danish Cartoons, and I haven’t been warning the ones coming to give the khutbah that we have heard the cartoon khutbah already so they should give another one. But, regardless of the repetition of the message, there is one common theme that the khutbahs have shared which I feel is very beneficial to us.

- The stressing of the fact that to love the Prophet PBUH, means that you must do more than just burn some tires and break some windows. To love the Prophet PBUH means that you try your best to do as he PBUH said to us, and this means that you emulate him in any way you can and you obey him in everything that you can.

-Allah says in the Quran

لَقَدْ كَانَ لَكُمْ فِي رَسُولِ اللَّهِ أُسْوَةٌ حَسَنَةٌ لِّمَن كَانَ يَرْجُو اللَّهَ وَالْيَوْمَ الْآخِرَ وَذَكَرَ اللَّهَ كَثِيرًا

Ye have indeed in the Messenger of Allah a beautiful pattern (of conduct) for any one whose hope is in Allah and the Final Day, and who engages much in the Praise of Allah.

- We at UMBC know of the fitnah we dealt with last month when the Retriever Weekly wrote an article attacking our Prophet, our religion, and those who follow it. But alhumdulillah, this fitnah was small and the MSA with the help of some alumni, had a meeting with the administration, the author of the article, made clear to them our position, and had a counter article published in the paper which clarified Islam and was insha Allah very beneficial to those who seek the truth.

- Now this fitnah was extremely small when compared to what our brothers and sisters at NYU faced this past week. I sent out an email explaining how a group on their campus was going to actually display the cartoons in an attempt to defend the rights to free speech, and that the MSA there needed our assistance in putting pressure on their school’s administration to disallow this event from taking place.

- I received an email from the NYU MSA and in it, the President explained to me what happened and I thought that I would share it with you all. The pressure put on the school forced them to take action, and they told the organization that they would not be able to display the cartoons and that no outsiders would be able to come to the event due to security concerns. The MSA had planned a massive protest outside of this event, and before the event began the MSA took a brilliant step by buying up all the tickets to the event so that nobody would be able to attend it. The MSA then instead of protesting, held a teach in outside of the event in which their was a talk about who the Prophet PBUH actually was. This event was attended by the President and vice president of the university, who showed solidarity with the MSA.

- Brothers and sisters, this is the type of power that we as Muslims need to exihibit when our religion is attacked. To run through the streets pillaging, and to resort to vigilantism as a means of exacting revenge does nothing more than play right into the hands of those who made the cartoons, by showing to them that we are just what the cartoons suggest.

- Our strength needs to be a strength in numbers, and strength in education, and a strength in resolve, as this is the only way that our claims will be legitimized and we will be taken seriously.

BONUS part of the khutbah that I thought was a little too heavy for the audience so i left it out

- This type of obedience extends to the scholars as well, as Muhammed PBUH told us in a authentic narration that “The scholars are heirs of the Prophets. The Prophets do not leave behind an inheritance of gold and silver; they leave behind the inheritance of knowledge. Whoever acquired knowledge, acquired a lot of wealth."

- Now this narration means that the rulings of this religion, of Allah swt and HIS Prophet PBUH, are going to be passed to us through a certain methodology. This methodology was never through scribes writing books and encyclopedias of information for us to get and read and derive rulings from. The methodology was that of the Prophet PBUH teaching his companions who were in his presence, then these companions teaching their companions who were in their presence, so on and so forth. This chain of teaching is still established today and can be found in the 4 schools of thought which are still being preserved in the same respect as we speak. This lineage of sound knowledge is preserved by the promise of Allah swt in the Quran, and by the methodology described by our beloved Prophet PBUH.

- Nowadays many so called progressive Muslims have given themselves the right to now restart the circle, and to reinterpret things through their own methods of convenience. They have no regard for the science of keeping this knowledge pure, but instead they wish to change rulings in an ad hoc fashion for their own comfort.

- We as followers of the Prophet Muhammed PBUH need to be very careful with these types of people, because in essence, these people are calling for us to refuse that which is coming to us of Allah through established methods, and to instead follow our own intellect as was the call of Shaytaan.

Thursday, March 30, 2006

New Desktop pic...

Monday, March 27, 2006

For my Sisters...

Hey Sisters,

I felt as though it was my duty to pass along this naseehah to you all since I am a guy, and I think advice like this many guys are afraid to touch upon, but alhumdulillah, Im not very shy in this regard.

The advice is not in response to something that just one person did, nor is it necessarily directed at anyone in particular. Its just that I have heard about this particular issue before and its something I dont think that you girls even realize your doing, so ima throw it out there, you can take it how you like insha Allah.

If there is a guy who is a practicing Muslim, that has even the most remote possibility of being interested in you, and there is even a slight possibility that you might entertain the brother's proposal if he were to even approach for marriage, then dont, I repeat...DONT under any circumstances for any reason talk about another guy that you are interested in, or talk about some pre-rishta situation your dealing with currently.

You may feel compelled to talk to someone about an issue that your dealing with, and there could be a guy who you respect and think could give you some good advice, if this guy fits the aforementioned description, DO NOT tell him about any situations your in with another guy. If you know that the main thing you want to talk about doesnt have to really deal with another guy, and that the other guy could possibly be left out of the description of your issue your dealing with, then by any means necessary KEEP THE GUY OUT OF IT!!!

The guy will think that you told him for 3 possible reasons:
1) You want to let him know that you are really not interested in him and that you see him as just a good brother in the community who can help with your problem.
2) You want to introduce a 'third wheel' in order to draw a reaction out of the brother. Yes, you sisters do do this, dont deny it. You dont even realize it but it does happen.
3) You want to let the brother know that you have other people who are interested in you and are approaching you, so you want to maybe let the brother know that if he wants to make any moves then he better get to movin.

If you do something like this, know that the brother will be absolutely confused trying to figure out which of the 3 reasons you told him for, and if he was interested in you, he will not know if you are trying to tell him to leave you alone.

Guys who practice and dont date, they can be rather insecure about this sort of thing so anything like this will make them feel even more unsure.

So bottom line, something like this is not a good idea. Find someone who you KNOW your not getting married to, if you dont find someone like that then keep the situation ambiguous without showing any emotion for this other guy, and by any means do NOT talk about the guy's looks. Any guy who practices this deen is going to have some level of gheerah (legitimate jealousy) and will not appreciate something like that.

Be good my sisters, and I got your back on letting you inside the world of the brothers.

Sunday, March 26, 2006

Saturday School Moments...

So my Saturday school kids are absolutely nuts.

The younger ones have seen Gandaghee so they think im a movie star while my older class thinks im Michael Vick because I play football with em during recess and I DESTROY the poor 9-12 year olds.

So today im teaching my younger kids salaah, fara'id of the salaah, manners in salaah when praying in congregation, that sort of thing.

So as soon as I start talking about the manners in jamaa' the kids start blurting things out from Gandaghee.

"Remember brother Iboo when you had those glasses on and were like 'ameeeeEEEEEEEn'"
"You know thats wrong, right?"
"Yeah brother Iboo, we know thats wrong."
"Good"

Then we get to rukoo'

"Brother Iboo, the back has to be at a 90 degree angle. That was in Gandaghee"
"Yeah Abdul Wadood, very good!"
"Yeah brother Iboo, and also you shouldnt look through your legs because some people do that and your not supposed to do that"

This went on for a while with kids just blurting things out and subhan Allah, for one of the few times I was actually proud of the movie and grateful for making it as it was beneficial for so many youths. These kids actually watched it and gained from it!

Is there a better feeling than having your duas answered?

Rabbana 'alayka tawakkalna, wa ilayka anab'na wa ilaykal maseer.

Then my older kids and I were having a discussion about sincerity in intention being the ultimate when it comes to deeds. I told them about how even the Hijrah, such a huge and great deed in the account of the muhajiroon could have been degraded to a low level because of the intention of someone not being solely for Allah swt.

The kids kind of got it but it seemed like they were a bit confused, but subhan Allah, Allah inspired me somehow to come up with an analogy that they would understand clearly.

I told them to think of our good account as a metal gate suspended in the air above us, our deeds as balloons, and our breath as helium. I told them to imagine that our good deeds, as we do them, is like we are blowing up the balloon. Then, if the deed is sincere we will tie the balloon up and then let it go and it will catch on the gate suspended in the air where the rest of our good deeds are waiting. Then a deed which is not done sincerely, I told them to imagine this deed as a balloon which has been filled up with air, and then before it could be tied and sealed, you let it go and all the gas is let out of it and its left as a piece of rubber on the floor. This type of deed could be something as great as the hijrah, but if done without sincerity it will not be rewarded in the hearafter.

Alhumdulillah the kids got it!

I love my Saturday school kids, and I pray that I am able to continue teaching for years to come.

Friday, March 24, 2006

Sacrifice...

Is there any greater test of sincerity than to sacrifice something which you love for the sake of Allah swt?

Tonight I was faced with a dillemma in my heart.

I would like to think that I am not a person who is deceptive and dishonest, and I would like to think that I am not a hypocrite. But tonight all of these adjectives plus a few more were swimming around in my head until finally my heart said "enough is enough!"

How could I possibly say that which I do not do? It is a great thing to Allah that we say that which we do not do.

There are two things to me which allows a person to become truely humble and to truely earn the favor of Allah swt of hidaaya.

Sacrifice and Struggle.

Im not talking sacrifice of something that if you let it go you wont even notice that it is gone, or something that you were going to get rid of anyway so you might as well do it now. Im talking about sacrificing something that you love. Something that is dearer to you than anything else. Something like listening to music for instance. You know that you listen to music whenever you step in the car and whenever you are working out, then sacrifice this music for the sake of Allah and replace it with something which will gain you good deeds like Quran. Or a better example which i promised I would touch upon in a later post is sacrificing talking to the opposite gender on AIM. This is something that we take so lightly, and we think that we have everything under control and that we are talking about deen things and not dunyaawi things so its all good, right?

Wrong.

Before you know it, your heart has become attached to this person that you are speaking to, and the very beauty of this religion and the virtues of the deen which you two speak about have been comprised by your intention and have now become the fuel of your desire to speak to this person.

Do we not recognize how fragile our heart is?

How can we possibly think that we are going to talk to someone on AIM, someone who is religious, knowledgable, God fearing, funny and down to earth without becoming attached? What are you a rock? Just because you talk of marriage and you talk of each other's rishta stories and rishta blunders and bloopers, does this mean that you two have somehow reached a new level in your relationship, a level where despite the fact that you connect on almost everything, you enjoy each other's company and you have the exact same interests, you somehow are not doing something wrong by talking because your practicing muslims and you couldnt possibly be doing something wrong since you arent talking about haraam stuff? Do you think that you are some super human entity which transcends feelings and emotion, and that you will be able to withstand this onslaught of fitnah by maintaining your bipartisanship and be able to control your feelings for a person who is of such a high level of character?

It is absolutely devastating to the heart of a believer that he/she feel arrogant and self sufficient in matters of gray area when it comes to self control, as even the Sahabah avoided the gray areas to the extent that it is reported that abu Bakr ra was eating food brought to him by one of his slaves/servants. While abu Bakr ra was eating the food the servant informed him that this food had been bought by money which was earned by cheating in a business of soothsaying. Immediately abu Bakr ra put his fingers down his throat and vomitted all that had entered his body.

Nowadays we think we can handle this type of stuff and that it wont effect us in any way because we are super religious active MSA people who are immune to harm.

Allah swt set an example for us in the Quran of Ibrahim PBUH who loved his family so much. He loved Ismaeel so much that Allah swt tested the Prophet PBUH by ordering him to slaughter his son. Can we even fathom the idea? Can we even imagine being commanded to slaughter our own flesh and blood, and then Ibrahim PBUH having no hesitiation in fullfilling the command and Ismaeel PBUH offering his neck on the stone so that he can be a part of this obedience to Allah?

What is our Ismaeel?

What are we willing to sacrifice for the sake of Allah swt so that Allah will be pleased with us? Do we not believe that Allah will replace that which we sacrifice with something better and full of barakah? Do we not have tawakkul?

If you sacrifice talking to a sister/brother online for the sake of Allah, a sister/brother who you know is perfect for you in almost every way, then dont you know that Allah will either grant you this sister/brother or something better and fill your union with blessing?

And do not legitimize talking to this sister/brother in your mind for any reason. Even if you know that the feeling is one sided and that the sister/brother only sees you as a big brother/sister who can help her with her/him problems and can talk to you about deen stuff and benefit her/him with it. Dont try and tell yourself that since its only you who is feeling this that then somehow it will be ok. Its not. Its still going to bring your imaan down, its still being recorded by the angels on your shoulders no matter the other person's intentions, and you will still be hurt more the longer you keep the online relationship going.

Ask yourself: Why are you talking to this person online? Is there a need for it? How late do you talk? How long are your conversations no matter the topic? Would you talk to her/him like this if you saw her/him in person, for the same amount of time and with the same relaxed attitude?

These questions should be clear cut enough that if you ponder over the answers, and you fear Allah, you will end the convos.

How foolish we are to think that we can take our own paths and ignore the path that has been set up by our Prophet PBUH. A path which is so absolutely amazing, that a person is honored to follow that path and the path is in need of no person to follow it in order to maintain its honor.

Allah swt says in Surah Ankaboot what translates to mean "And those who strive in Our (cause),- We will certainly guide them to our Paths: For verily Allah is with those who do right."

Guidance is earned through struggle and striving, and the path to follow to salvation is not an easy path. It requires discipline, hard work, and dedication.

Let us not lower ourselves by taking this deen as some sort of pop culture movement which is just regulating what we wear and how we talk, and then we act just like everyone else.

Sincerity is all we have complete and absolute control over, and that is what we will be judged by. Our limbs may not have the ability to carry out that which our heart desires sincerely, yet we must have the comfort of knowing that our Lord is one who is ar Raheem and al Adl (the most merciful and the most just) and then act upon this thought by trying our hardest to be completely sincere.

Make dua for me, as I am going through a transition period which I will detail in a later post insha Allah.

May Allah make us among those who are mukhliseen.

Thursday, March 23, 2006

A small price to pay...


What are you looking at you might ask? Well a little bit of spittle on my shirt is a small price to pay to be able to dance with my Maryam.

It seems as though i have been designated the cry doctor for my Maryam.

She tends to stay up from like 3 in the morning crying and her caretakers sometimes will just bring her next to the sofa im sleeping on in the living room and wake me up. This again happened today.

Apparently Maryam had been restless and crying since waay early in the morning and around 10AM my brother's mother in law just brought her down in her carrier and sat her next to my head. I woke up, put on my contacts and began to interview the patient.

"How long has she been crying?"
"Since 5"
"Is she crying with her eyes open or her eyes closed?"
"Both"
"Ok...I know what she needs"

At this point the amatuers took a step back as I cracked my knuckles and picked up the little squirt (Yams is what I have tagged her). Thats when I started to try various methods to quiet her down.

I started with the classic baby bounce "Kyu rorey Maryam?? Kya huwa? Kon Satay?" (Why are you crying Maryam? What happened? Who bothered you?")

She was non responsive and her crying persisted.

"Has she been fed?"
"Yes"

Hmm...at this point I am almost dumfounded as to why she is crying.

But it was time.

Time to bust out the secret weapon. A weapon so powerful it can not only stop the crying and ease Ms Cranky Pants, but actually reverse her mood putting her in a playful mood laughing and chillin.

Its da Maryam Dance.

Its more a song than a dance, but at any rate, I took Maryam away from my chest and my shirt which she had just soiled, held her in my arms and called her name. Upon hearing her name she kinda peaked at me, and I started the procedure.

"badoom badoom badoom badoom badoom..Maryaaaaaam badoom badoom badoom badoom badoom"

This stanza is repeated as I do the harlem shake-ish bobble head maneuver, gently moving her around with the rhythm.

Today I had to do it for longer than usual to pipe her down, but as I finished the soothing rhythmic routine, and stopped moving and was just singing the badoom badoom's, her hand was still moving to my song. It was amazing.

My niece has my sense of rhythm!!!

Saturday, March 18, 2006

Marriage Post # 4- The Ideal Wife

Abu Hurairah (Allah be pleased with him) reported Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) as saying: A woman may be married for four reasons: for her property, her status. her beauty and her religion, so try to get one who is religious, may your hand be besmeared with dust.

This hadith details the reasons why any person gets married, and it also details all the qualities a man looks for in a wife, with the rasul PBUH telling us the best of the 4 things is the deen, but this does not mean you disregard the other 3 qualities of a wife and just focus on one.

In this post I will take you inside my detailed rating system on what I think makes an ideal wife. I am sharing this so that insha Allah you brothers can get an idea on what type of sister you want, while sisters can read this and recognize what it is that the brothers are actually looking for.

Each of the 4 categories is going to be accompanied by a percentage to show how important the particular quality is to complete an ideal sister, showing how important the category is when weighted against the other qualities. Then I have detailed the categories with intricacies on what exactly the category means to me in a realistic situation. Some may be surprised by what the deen category has in it, but it should be clear that the Prophet PBUH said that he was only sent to perfect the manners, meaning that the character and personality of a person is at the foundation of the person’s deen.

The status part is strictly preference and is not meant to put certain people down, rather its what I think is ideal for my situation.

1) Deen (60%)

Character (35%)

(1) Knows role of woman

(a) Second in command, active participant in household decisions
(b) Maintains the home
(c) Silatur Rahim (maintains relationships with inlaws, family, etc)

(d) Cooking
(i) Do not want a chef, just someone who takes pride in cooking
(ii) Cooks when there is no food, if there is not food then takes initiative to make food


(iii) Bonus
1. Can cook kichree, keema and andow ka achaar (hydro food)


(2) Modesty

(a) Does not just wear hijab, but lives hijab
(i) Scarf wrapped in a fashion that exhibits true knowledge of what modesty means (tight, around neck, etc)
(ii) Wears mostly Jilbab
(iii) Does not wear jeans revealing form
(iv) Bonus
1. Would wear niqaab if asked

(b) Does not hang out with non mahrem guys
(c) Does not keep herself ‘seen’ but rather stays in the shadows and is reserved

(3) Tongue

(a) Does not lie
(b) Does not curse
(c) Does not gossip/backbite
(d) Keeps tongue moist with adhkaar
(e) Keeps conversations with non mahrems brief
(f) Does not raise voice in public/private
(g) Non-confrontational
(h) Sensible in discussions (not argumentative)

(4) Heart

(a) Soft heart
(i) Cries often
(ii) Feels pain and suffering of others and is affected by it

(b) Purification
(i) Takes steps to purify heart (adhkaar, istighfaar, etc)
(ii) Actively pursues tazkiyyatun nafs (halaqaat, etc)

(5) Sense of Humor/Personality

(a) Understands my sense of humor
(b) Smiles…a lot
(c) Light-hearted
(d) Can actually tell a joke

(e) Not a cornball
(i) Sample conversation with a cornball
1. Me, “so then I was like, yo, wth are you doin? Your nuts!”
2. Her “what do you mean nuts? Whats that mean? Cashews?”

(f) Bonus(es)
(i) Watched Gandaghee, laughed at jokes
(ii) Is capable of making me laugh
(iii) Will not cry if I play a practical joke on em
(iv) Plays practical jokes on others
(v) Is not so fragile that if I make a joke of them that they will cry

(g) Personable, not afraid to meet new people

Quran (35%)

(1) Actively memorizing the Quran
(2) In the last year memorized at least a juzz
(3) Has enough knowledge of the Quran to teach it correctly IE tajweed rules
(4) Reads Quran regularly after Fajr (Surah Israa’ ayah 78)
(5) Listens to Quran (as opposed to music)

Salah (20%)

(1) Does not miss salah for any reason except for when they cant pray
(2) Has khushoo’ in salah
(3) Prays for love of Allah, not necessarily out of fear

(4) Fajr

(a) Has internal fajr clock (does not need me to wake em)
(b) Can not remember the last 2 times they missed fajr
(c) Stays up after fajr making dhikr/reading Quran (Surah Israa’ ayah 78)

(5) Bonus

(a) Regularly makes sunnah and nawafil

Arabic (10%)

(1) Has/is learning Arabic grammer (fusha)
(2) Recognizes the importance of knowing Arabic
(3) Willing to continue with education of Arabic

(4) Bonus

(a) Knows Arabic enough to read books and understand them

Status (20%)

(1) “Apple does not fall far from the tree”

(a) Mother (50%)
(1) Welcoming
(2) Quiet
(3) Simple
(4) Personable
(5) Maintains the house
(6) Wears Hijab
(7) Much much more

(b) Father (30%)
(1) Loving
(2) Humble
(3) Not-Superficial
(4) Encouraging

(5) Bonus
(a) Involved in community

(c) Lineage/family history (20%)

(1) Born in U.S. or at least lived here 5 years
(2) Family is Muslim for generations

(a) Bonus
(i) Hydro
(ii) Family friends/mutual family friends

3) Beauty (15%)

a) LOL…you really think I would discuss this here?

4) Property (5%)

a) Dependence on money
i) Has seen struggle
ii) Can survive without riches
iii) If necessary, willing to sacrifice comfort
iiii) Content with what they have (hadith of Ibrahim PBUH coming and visiting Ismael PBUH and saying "change your doormat"
b) Debt
i) Has little to no outstanding debt
c) Bonus
i) Has her own car!!!

Monday, March 06, 2006

Random Reflections...

Salaamu alaykum guys,

Its been a while no doubt since ive posted, but its because ive been reflecting on a paper i was going to write on the ills of the misuse of AIM, and how it effects muslimeen practicing or otherwise. The paper will be coming soon insha Allah, but until then I will fill you guys in with what has been swimming around in my mind.
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1. Complexity of Creation, Simplicity of Being

  • As I progress through my biology courses I learn more and more how complex our creation is. Our cells contain intricaces which can not be mimicked even by our present day technologically advanced society, and this is just a PART of a cell! How can you possibly be athiest after having even the slightest knowledge of our creation?
  • This rumination stemmed from my reflection on how our daily lives are dictated by urges and desires. Our body has an urge to use the restroom; do you think that we would possibly take time out of our day if it was optional to relieve ourselves? Definitely not, yet Allah instills this urge in us so that we can survive. Same goes for everything we do, including procreating. Allah swt has given us the desire to get married and procreate, and this pleasure leads to the biggest responsibility that any one of us could have: having a child. The responsibilities that one has after having a child are responsibilities that we would in no way desire to have, unless this was induced by our desire to procreate. I look around, and I see nothing but people having children out of wedlock and these young girls (usually by themselves) have a huge burden on their shoulders because they decided to follow their desires without weighing the benefits and drawbacks of following their urges. How amazing a balance we have as human beings between our desires and our intellect, and how thin a line it is we must traverse daily. "And for those who fear standing before their Lord, wa guard their selves (nafs) from following baseless vain desires, for them are gardens everlasting" - al Quran.

2. Sense of smell and its connection to our emotions

  • I remember how when I put on just a little bit of a scented oil, and sat next to my then 2 week old niece, she immediately turned and looked towards me. Then as I got up and walked away Mar'yam (yes that is now the OFFICIAL spelling) began to cry. This made me remember my own connection between smell and people.
  • My nani (may Allah preserve her) is here as yet another helper for my sis-in-law and her new child. My nani (and I guess that everyone else's nani) has this particular smell that when I smell her it takes me to a sense of almost felicitiy. She usually stays in my room when she comes to visit and when she leaves she leaves her beautiful smell behind. Last time she left I remember sleeping on my pillow where she also had laid her head, and the smell made me cry because she had gone.

Thats all for now, feel free to pick my brain.